Thursday, December 11, 2008

Things we used to do...or wanted to do...

There is so many dreams that gets shatterred from this condition...  I have had a lot that I wanted to do and have been doing, that is now out of reach.  It is strange tho...as at times it seems like there is a hand guiding me, blocking my path to things I want to do but which is obviously not meant to be...

Starting with the more "childlike" dreams...

I wanted to be a Fighter pilot/Race car driver

Not possible with poor eye-sight, weak knees and now even less possible due to my heart problems (not to menchion my age hehe)

The more realistic dreams...

I wanted to start doing EPEE (Fencing)

At one stage, I thought the exercise would do my knees good and that my knees were just going through a difficult growth stage.  I have always been fascinated with sword fighting, especially from the dark ages but because sword fighting reinactment was a little too "play acting" for my taste, fencing was the next logical step.  I even signed up for a class, explaining my difficulties with dislocations in the past which the instructor said he could most likely work around and was about to start when I had a horrible dislocation that wiped that dream off the slate for ever.  As a fall back...

I wanted to practice Archery

Next to sword fighting this was another fascination for me...but strangely enough, this too was cut short as I developed problems in my wrists and subsequently was diagnosed with Marfan's

I wanted to grow my musical talent

I have an uncanny talent for music...being able to play songs by just hearing, on the piano and keyboard and I had even started trying my hand at composing.  I would have most likely excelled if I didn't have a problem with theory.  Any theory...wether it is history, economics, math...my brain just can not absorb it.  I can only learn through practical experience.  I can read sheet music but I can't read and play at the same time and I can not learn a piece because of this "theoretical" block in my mind....  To give a good example, my final programming exam results, came down to 36% for Theory but 98% for practical and this echoed throughout my school and college years and still is an issue.  But, as with the Archery, this has been placed on hold yet I still at times beared the pain and kept playing...untill now.  I am getting serious joint instability problems in my right shoulder so for now, this hobby is completely on hold.

So what am I doing now...

R/C Hellicopters

At this point, this is the only hobby that I can do while sitting down and not placing a lot of strain on my wrists and/or shoulder.  Don't get me wrong, even though this is not my first choice, I am enjoying it.  It is taking me longish to get to grips with...but that's the fun in it.  "It's not so much about reaching the destination as it is about the journey it's self".  I can now at least maintain level hovering without the chopper careening out of control and I am slowly starting to turn it in different angles and trying flight...It's much more difficult than what it seems, at least to me, as you not only have to persuade your mind that the controls switch around when flying towards you but you also have the added third dimension of elevation that you need to control.  The helo that I am flying is what is called a "Trainer", so it has dual rotors on top instead of a tail rotor to make it easier to control while learning.  The downside is that it is more suited to indoors flight than outdoors as it is too light to withstand even the slightest of breeze.  Flying indoors creates a unique challenge in that objects are much closer and causes inconsistent flight behaviour due to turbulance bouncing off the objects from the helo's rotors.

Although I am sure that this is most likely a painfull subject for most...what dreams have you had that has been sabotaged by your bodies lack of cooperation...and what do you do instead?

Monday, December 8, 2008

Shoe is on the other foot...

If you recall, my dad hurt his back picking up Jessy when we were taking her to the vet's...  Well, Jessy is doing waaay better.  We have halved her medication cus if we give her a full tablet, she's worse than a jack in the box with a tail!

As for my dad...things aren't that good...  The doc's initially gave him anti-inflams and sent him on his way.  On Friday, he couldn't take it any more and went back to the doc's.  They finally decided to run some tests and X-Rays.  When the X-Ray's had come back, it turns out my dad has Osteoperosis in one of his vertebrae as it is noteably smaller than the rest and causing him severe pain.  Being his brooding, hard-headed self, he just shrugs and carries on lifting chairs and carrying things around...  It's going to be hard for him to learn not to do silly things like that.  He is always afraid my mom would get hurt by carrying things, but he will have to get used to the fact that my mom is the "strong" one in the family now.

Without being nasty tho, may-haps he will now understand what I have to go through on a daily basis and how difficult it is for me to stand around doing nothing while the rest of the family scurry about carrying groceries and moving furniture...  but with him... I somehow doubt that.  He would rather carry his own coffin than be carried to the grave...

The other aspect of this issue is yes, my dad is getting older but the fact that my grandma also had major Osteoperosis problems, hints to it being linked to the Marfan's.  My dad has never shown (or at least admitted) to any problems even though he has had some indicators, including spontanious pneumothoraxis.

He still needs to go for a bone-density test, so we don't know yet just how bad it is.

As far as I can see, the most that can be done is calcium supplements and at this point, I am not going to run paranoid that I might have it...or should I.  In any case, I drink a lot of supplements already, so there isn't much that can be done otherwise in the first place.